New York at Brooklyn, Dec. 5: The city still belongs to the Knicks, who have the tradition and the glamour. But the Nets threw down the gauntlet in the offseason, hiring Jason Kidd as their coach about four minutes after he retired from the Knicks and acquiring Kevin Garnett and Paul Pierce, mortal enemies of the Knicks. Nets owner Mikhail Prokhorov will pay roughly $85 million in luxury tax this season, which about equals the payroll of the Knicks, usually among the NBA’s top spenders. And remember last season, when Garnett and Knicks star Carmelo Anthony argued about the taste of Honey Nut Cheerios and J.R. Smith elbowed Celtics guard Jason Terry in the postseason? Those feuds will now be fueled by this rivalry.
Miami at Indiana, Dec. 10: No team has taken bigger steps in attempting to dethrone the Heat than the Pacers, who pushed Miami to seven games last season and significantly strengthened their bench, a decidedly weak link. They play again eight days later in Miami.
LA Clippers at Boston, Dec. 11: Doc Rivers returns to the Gaaah-den. He probably will get a nice ovation from Celtics fans, although there is plenty of time between now and then for sordid details about his departure to leak out.
Oklahoma City at Memphis, Dec. 11: A pair of teams that want a shot at the Spurs in May take their first shot at each other. Grizzlies forward Zach Randolph may want a shot at Thunder center Kendrick Perkins after telling him last year, “I’ll beat yo’ ass!”
The Christmas quintupleheader starts at Noon ET with Chicago-Brooklyn playoff rematch, followed by Oklahoma City at New York. (Any kids asking Santa for tickets to both games? You can do it by subway and only miss one quarter of one game). Later, Miami visits the Lakers, San Antonio hosts Houston and the Clippers travel to Golden State. If you are still watching at this point, go out and buy your wife another present.
Miami at Portland, Dec. 28: “At center for the Heat, number 52, Greg Oden.” BOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brooklyn at Boston, Jan. 26: Pierce and Garnett return to TD Garden for the first time since the trade. While Garnett was beloved in his six years in Boston, Pierce is definitely more of the Celtics fabric, having spent 15 years as the face of the franchise and enduring some really tough times – including nearly dying when he was stabbed in a bar – before ending a 22-year title drought in 2008. The trade probably bumps Pierce to sixth man on the All-Time Celtics Team behind Russell, Cousy, Havlicek, Bird and McHale. He deserves his own five-minute standing ovation.
San Antonio at Miami, Jan. 26: The Spurs return to where they allowed a championship to slip through their fingers, squandering a five-point lead in the final 28 seconds of Game 6 of the NBA Finals and dropping Game 7 as well. The game is televised by ABC, which means both teams will be off the previous day – and Spurs coach Gregg Popovich can’t claim his players need rest. The rematch is March 6 in San Antonio.
Utah at Philadelphia, Feb. 12: Tankapalooza will be well under way by this point, with several opening acts. But this is the main event. No team in the West is trying to throw away the season more than the Jazz and no team in the East is trying to throw away the season than the Sixers, who STILL DON’T HAVE A COACH!!! The rematch is Mach 8 in Utah. Good seats still available.
Houston at LA Lakers, Feb. 19: Dwight Howard returns to Los Angeles. The 19 Lakers fans who actually arrive in time for the pregame introductions boo loudly. Bryant refuses to shake Howard’s hand, much the way he did with Shaquille O’Neal years ago.
Phoenix at Sacramento, April 16: On the season’s final day, Tankapalooza wraps up with two teams who spent the entire season trying to lose as much as possible. Kings guard Ben McLemore’s shot selection is so bad that no one knows if management has told him to miss on purpose.