Optimism on life support, or anyone up for a Historic Blunder? Of course, NBA players would be out of their gourds to reject 50 percent of revenue because it’s not 51 percent, a difference of, oh, $400 million over 10 years … compared to the $780 million they lose in a 50-game season … or $2 billion if there’s no season. Who lets these guys out without babysitters? Of course, that also applies to the owners who are threatening to shut down for
Heisler Column: If this is symbolic, which is Beavis and which is Butthead?
Even if the NBA makes a deal today — as I always thought it would in time to play by Dec. 1 — I’m past congratulating anyone for their part in this farce. I’m filing this as written before they do a deal, go to war, or whatever. ___ Now that we know what the lockout is—a symbolic battle, rather than one over dollars, since that has been essentially settled—I have one question for David Stern and his owners and Billy Hunter
Heisler Column: Say the secret word, buttheads
Say the secret word, will you, buttheads? Groucho Marx had a quiz show where contestants who said the secret word got $100, delivered by a papier-mache duck dropping in over their heads. The word was easy, but not as easy as the secret word in the NBA lockout, which owners and players just have to utter for a duck to come down and give them $4 billion. We even know the word, just as Groucho’s audience did … It’s “Fifty-one!” That’s also represented as 51
Heisler Column: At Long Last, Crunch Time
By Mark Heisler Talk about the matchup we waited our whole lives for … Bryant Gumbel vs. Paul Allen! What’s the chance of them fighting a steel cage death match? Things look that bad — as things figured to at this point with the warring parties already out $330 million … soon to be $660 million when Jefferson Davis, er, David Stern cancels two more weeks. The NBA trotted out Allen, the nation’s No. 23-ranked billionaire, now cautioning prudence after years of $100 million payrolls
Heisler Column: War is hell. Just ask JaVale McGee
By Mark Heisler Ask JaVale McGee if war isn’t hell. I’m not sure who else thinks the situation is “definitely critical,” other than the Wizards center and, of course, the press. It’s definitely not the NBA owners, who laughed their rear ends off at McGee’s, uh, candid reporting at last week’s union meeting in Beverly Hills, Calif. Cutting out an hour early, JaVale told a press throng in the lobby of the Beverly Hilton that “some guys ready to stand strong” but noted, “there were,
Heisler column: Hold that Apocalypse
By Mark Heisler Apocalypse now, or not. The worst was about to come to pass, the majority of the media had predicted, wisely or in search of ever-more dire scenarios and ever-bigger headlines, as talks broke off last week with the NBA seemingly prepared to cancel its openers. Actually, the preferred press scenario was doomsday, the cancellation of more than the openers … like the entire 2011-12 season. Seeing any small part of it come true would have made everyone nuts, prompting speculation about
Heisler Column: Goodbye mid-level, hello NBA season
By Mark Heisler Gee, already? After a one-month stalemate, a year of posturing, hints of contraction, et al., NBA owners and players began to engage last week…. Almost. The owners reportedly bumped their offer up… by like 1 percent. Hey, these things proceed at their own excruciating pace, and it was still early to expect anyone’s best offer. There was David Stern’s usual foreshadowing (“The calendar is not our friend”) and his usual light moment, even as darkness gathered (“We told them we wouldn’t say anything,
Heisler column: Only Stern knows true timetable
By Mark Heisler Mama, put my guns in the ground, I can’t shoot them anymore. That long, black cloud is comin’ down. Feel like I’m knocking … Oh, not yet? This just in: The NBA season, preseason, training camps and even the pre-camp media days aren’t over yet! As for those hopelessly stalemated talks with rifts reportedly opening on both sides? Yeah, right. Everything you’ve seen and heard to this point is play-acting. As far as actual negotiations, neither side has even started yet. Given the NBA
- « Previous Page
- 1
- …
- 14
- 15
- 16