Loud people may not understand this column. But as Rocky Balboa once pontificated, there is such a thing as “the disease of being shy.” It’s a tough thing, really. You can’t easily overcome shyness, and it doesn’t really go away over time. Shy people don’t always get everything they deserve, because non-shy people often mistake their shyness for docility or indifference. In our extrovert-dominant, squeaky-wheel-gets-the-grease society, being quiet can hurt you. You don’t see a ton of shy people winning Academy Awards, or running for President,
Most Improved Player Rankings: It’s Not LeBron’s League Anymore
The two aging giants came together at center court, a herd of national TV cameras surrounding them like those crazy, suicidal fish that swim alongside sharks and somehow get away with it. (Nature is weird, man). They embraced, in that bro-hug type of way players do, and shared a few words of mutual respect before going their separate ways, Kobe Bryant toward the ruthlessly dimming twilight of his career and LeBron James out of the visitor’s locker room at Staples Center,
Most Improved Player Rankings: Can Steph Curry really keep getting better?
I’ve been watching a lot of Donald Trump speeches lately (not by choice), so like our possible future president, I’m just going to come right out and say something stupid off the top of my head: I don’t think Stephen Curry is real. I think he’s an Old Spice commercial, tricking all of us into thinking he’s actually doing the things he’s doing on the court. Think about it for a second. It’s brilliant product placement, really. The man is cashing 40-foot shots on a routine basis. He’s
Who do U.S. presidential candidates believe is NBA’s Most Improved Player?
By this point in the season, every NBA fan on the planet has religiously read each one of my Most Improved Player rankings and my Sixth Man columns (probably). You all know what I, U.S. citizen Kels Dayton, think of the most impact players in the NBA in those two categories. And while my opinion is certainly meaningful and important, I am but one citizen in this great nation. I’m also an informed citizen who likes to make informed decisions when it comes
Most Improved Rankings: Who’s the Least Improved?
This column is soft. Every other week, we talk about the Most Improved Players in the league like we’re a modern-day Little League. We’re always telling everyone how great they are and giving them Fruit Roll-Ups, and letting them draw dinosaurs in the infield dirt during the game because they’re just creative and artistic and they’ll grow out of it and “everybody gets a trophy because look at how much you’ve improved!” Well, I’m sick of it. It’s time to come down hard on
Most Improved Player Rankings: Why winning the award might not be a compliment
Usually, people like awards. They’re shiny and sometimes gold. You get to keep them and hang them on your wall, and then “accidentally” bump into them when your grandma comes over, so she can say “Careful!” and then “Ooh, what’s that?,” and you can tell her about how awesome you are. Sometimes, you get to stand up in front of other people and give speeches when you win an award. You can say motivational things like, “You the Real MVP!” and get moved to
Most Improved Player Rankings: Edition I: The Birth of a Star
Some 7,500 light years away from Earth, at the center of a swirling vortex of nebulous clouds larger than our entire solar system lies Eta Carinae. A stellar system that burns over five million times brighter than our sun, Eta Carinae is the only star of its kind in the known universe. Observing it has sparked new theories and understandings of radiation, fusion, and spectral energy distribution. But astronomers and stargazers have watched and recorded Eta Carinae every night since 1679 for
Most Improved Player Rankings: Why Jimmy Butler should take home the award
It’s that time of year again. After all of the laughs, other-worldly performances, and misguided declarations that someone was dead, we’ve arrived at the end of the season. It’s time to pick a winner for the NBA’s Most Improved Player award. As always, I told myself I wasn’t going to cry. As always, I lied to myself. (Sniffle) We saw a lot of improvement in the NBA this season. The Atlanta Hawks went from Eastern Conference Playoff Team With a Losing Record™ to The Spurs
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